Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Strange Sex Laws.

A friend of mine posted these on facebook the other day, and I just had to share.  And you know I'm not going to stay silent on my own opinions or thoughts on these as well.

Strange Sex Laws.
1.  Oral Sex is illegal in 18 states, including Arizona. 
We are talking blow jobs right?  18 states, means there are thousands upon thousands of women who would love to use this against their husbands/boyfriends.  And many many men who would love to use this as an excuse to not go down on a woman.  So what's the penalty?

2.  In Virginia, it is illegal to have sex with the lights on.
Well, shit.  Guess I've been highly illegal!  What fun is it to not see what you are doing.  Groping around and grabbing a finger or a toe instead of a cock.  Hey, it happens!

3.  Sexual intercourse between an unmarried couple is illegal in Georgia.
Ha, maybe that's why the South has just low ages of consent!

4. It is illegal for husbands in Willowdale, Oregon to talk dirty during intercourse.
But it's ok to do so with you boyfriend, just keep an extra (or two) on the side if you like that kind of thing.

5.  Engaging in any sexual position other than missionary is illegal in Washington D.C.
Uh, oh.  What would Bill Clinton say??

6.  In Connorsville, Wisconsin, it is illegal for a man to shoot off a gun when his female partner is having an orgasm.
Seriously, what the fuck prompted this kind of law?  Is the man shooting (the gun!) at the woman - because then at least she is dying happy.

7.  In Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, it is illegal to have sex with a truck driver inside a tool booth.
Guess someone on the Pena Turnpike took a very interesting break and failed to collect tolls - if anyone has been on the Pena Turnpike they need all those tools for all the damn road construction they are CONSTANTLY doing.

8.  Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal in Florida.
Ouch, nothing more needs to be said.  Ouch

9.  It is illegal in Utah to marry your first cousin before the age of 65.
Because if you hit the age of 65 and you are still single, pickings are limited.  Those Mormons are serious about their marriage after all. 

10.  Sex with animals is perfectly legal for men in Washington state, as long as the animal weighs less than 40 pounds.
Sex with a chicken, fine.  Sex with a horse (or donkey!), not fine.  But if it's questionable, make sure to ask her weight.  Some of those animals can be tricky. 

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Keeping Score

So, this morning on my way into work I heard the radio DJ's talking about a new product called the Tally-Man.  See video below:

The Tally-man helps you "keep score"  in the bedroom.  You know, how many Orgasms each partner has.  Now if this is a real product, I'm not sure.  I couldn't find it referenced anywhere on the Interwebs, except thefisky.com who originally wrote the article.  But the idea still remains.

And for one, I cannot believe that couples desire such a product, or keep score.  Isn't a relationship about taking care of each other - including in the bedroom.  If you are so petty to keep score, I would say that's not the only problem in your relationship. 

I can see if - for instance - as a woman gave multiple BJ's to her man, and never received anything in return.  That is kind of crap - but only because he's using you as his personal getting off device.  But to keep a score of how many orgasms he had vs you - it just seems super silly.

Lets just concentrate on pleasuring each other, and what comes of it, comes of it. 

Friday, October 21, 2011

Oh, those wonderful nuts!

Ahh nuts...  And not THOSE nuts :)  I'm not a huge fan of the nuts attached to a man - but thats a whole other blog.

Seems these days that those people with nut allergies has increased, or at least we know a whole lot more about them.  So what if you are a woman with nut allergies?  How careful do you have to be?

Seriously careful, according to a case in the United Kingdom.  Turns out the first case of a woman having an allergic reaction during sex triggered by sex.  Oh yeah, you read that right.  A sexual allergic reaction (granted, I did watch a Strange Sex episode once about a woman who was allergic to SPERM!).

So this woman's boyfriend ate a handful of Brazil nuts (of all nuts - he chose the Brazil nut?  Humm.... I wouldn't have made that choice)  The woman knew she was severely allergic to nuts - so she asked her man to take serious precautions - he brushed his teeth, rinsed out his mouth, washed his hands and scrubbed under his fingernails.  They had sex, and the poor woman blew up in an allergic shock.  Oh yeah, turns out that nut proteins are in sperm...  So those nuts really did affect his nuts!

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Protecting the innocent and not so innocent

So, I've been writing this blog for some time.  It's been a fun past time for me.  Somewhere for me to get out frustrations and write once in awhile.  BUT, it's come to my attention that this blog - this fun thing for me might seriously be a hindrance to my dating.  Why, you might ask?  Well, I will tell you I haven't really dated at all since it went up.  Granted that is probably for a million other reasons!

With all that said, do I want to stop writing this?  Hell, no!  It's too much fun for me.  And really, it's all about my fun, isn't it?  If you aren't pleasing yourself, who is going to please you (and hey, get your mind OUT of the gutter, I'm not talking about that!)

So, I'm thinking two things:

1.  I need to stop publishing this blog in any way associated with my name.  Right now I have the link on my "fun" email, one of my personals ads (yes, I DO do that), and share it with people I know.  If I stopped doing this, no one could associate me to the blog.  An option.

2.  Make the promise, which I've kept since I started this blog, that I will NOT be including any personal stories.  So, if I go on a date with you, I'm not going to share the details of our date, how you curved to the left, or how you smelled (good or bad).  What I will do is give my general observations - based on my own experiences.  Even if you totally stand me up, or oppositely are the best ever (at whatever), I'm not going to blog about you.  If I do it will be in such general terms it could be anyone.  I.e. I've been with guys that smell good and some bad - those bad ones aren't just going to cut it.  Deal?