Blondes don't have more fun!

I'm a natural blond.  Born one of those little kids with white blonde hair that has faded to a dirty blonde with my advanced age.  They say that blondes have more fun, and it's great to be a blonde.  I beg to differ... and I saw an article on the frisky today that shows I'm not the only one!

According to the author.... (as always my comments in italics)

1. People think you’re an idiot. I have no idea when or how blonde hair became associated with inferior intelligence, but I can assure you this strange myth is alive and well. It comes in the form of pitying looks, snarky comments like, “Yep, she’s definitely a blonde!”, and offers of assistance that I didn’t need or ask for. I don’t want it to sound like blondes are systematically oppressed or anything, but dealing with the preconceived notion that I’m dumb just because I’m blonde is an annoying waste of time that I’d rather spend reading about theoretical physics.
Yup, I don't even have to speak and people think I'm stupid.  Then again, if I do mess up I can always blame my blond hair...

2. You have to listen to blonde jokes. Here is what I can only assume is the thought process that occurs in the moments before someone proudly tells me a painfully unfunny blonde joke: “Ooh! This woman has yellow-ish hair! Surely she would enjoy hearing about another woman with similarly colored hair who fucked all three legs of an upside down bar stool before she realized it wasn’t a sex toy!” How many annoyed blondes does it take to convince you to stop telling dumb blonde jokes? I don’t have a punchline for that one. I just genuinely want to know.
I cannot tell you how many stupid blond jokes I've heard in my lifetime.  And people don't get that when you tell them to me I can take personal offense.  Not all of them are funny and some are down right mean.  Then again, some are kind of funny - but those are rare.  The blond jokes are literally the bottom of the barrel when it comes to jokes.  Really, get some better material.

3. Your hair turns green in chlorine. When I was in junior high my best friend’s parents put in a swimming pool. For the next five years, I spent approximately 70% of my waking hours in that pool, and every summer my hair would transform from glistening gold waves into a dull, sickly greenish yellow frizz ball. Was it worth it? Yes. Was it attractive? No. Did I secretly kind of love it because it made me feel like Anne of Green Gables? Definitely.
Ugh, YES!  I grew up with a pool and all summer long my hair was this lovely shade of green.  One year I acted in an adaption of The Little Mermaid and I got teased relentlessly that we should just use my hair for seaweed. 

4. The shedding, my God, the shedding! It’s a fact that people with lightly pigmented hair have more hairs on their heads than people with darker hair. Does that mean that blondes shed more than other people? Based on the horrifying research I have conducted while trying to unplug the bathtub drain, I’m going to say yes. My boyfriend always knows where to find me, thanks to the Hansel and Gretel-style trails of hair I leave around the house, and he often stares at my consistently voluminous mane in disbelief. “You must literally lose and regrow all of your hair on a daily basis,” he says, before threatening to notify the government that I’m a mutant.
Right now I'm going through a serious shedding and I also go through horrible amounts of drain-o in my house.  When you are washing your hair and literally chunks come out in your hand you wonder how in the hell you still have hair on your head.  As an aside, I just saw an episode of "My Strange Addiction" where the guy (who was remarkably good looking) had an addiction to getting hair out of the bathtub drain.  At his friend's houses he would sneak into the bathroom (usually with women) -- find something and fish the hair out of the drain.  Thank god he didn't do anything gross with it, he just felt it in his fingers and then threw it away and thank god he didn't break into people's homes to do this... But yuck.

Note: this is the kind of attention, BUT...
if the attention was from Prince Harry,
then it's all ok :)

5. You attract a certain kind of attention. I’ve never been a non-blonde (as the term applies to both hair color and 90s rock bands), but friends of mine who have gone from brunette to blonde to black to red and back again tell me that blonde hair attracts a specific kind of attention, especially from men. Blondes are expected to be either pure, angelic virgins or dim, drooling nymphomaniacs. You can imagine how certain men might interact with these archetypes, how they expect you to act in return, and how it can get to be very unpleasant. But hey, what do I know? I’m just a dumb blonde. Now if you’ll excuse me, there’s an overturned bar stool in the corner that’s totally calling my name.
Everyone thinks you are a bimbo.  Now try having long blond hair, big boobs, and a name that ends in a -y (you know, all stripper and cheerleader like)... and imagine the attention you get.  Yup, now you know what it's like to be me.