Penis Sizes of the World Map

I must pass this little bit of information on... Someone out there (a genuis of course!) made a map of the average penis sizes of the world. 

I would like to point out a couple of things - 

1.  First, WTF, the United States is in the second to lowest category (11.67 - 13.48).  Now I also don't know what the unit of measurement is here - is it inches, it it flaccid or erect - I wish I could tell you, but I can't - and I also can't tell you where this came from - - remember, it's on the Internet so it must be true!
And for the United States to be on the low end might explain some things - - like why lately we have such a Napoleon complex and have a need to get involved in other countries affairs... (no judgement here, but we sure do seem to be putting out nose out there a great deal...)

2.  Looks like that whole Asian myth might just be true....

3.  As might be that black thing...

March Madness is the best time of the year for...

Vasectomies!

Yes, believe it or not.  During the start of start of March Madness, Dr. Stephen Jones of the Cleveland Clinic said there are 50% more vasectomies during the first week of March Madness than any other time of the year (no, I'm not making this shit up - this is real news from a real source - FoxNews.com)

Apparently, men like to get the ol' snip snip during a time when they can watch the NCAA basketball tournament while they are recovering.  For all the details... they have to keep keep ice on the "area" for at least a day keeping the area cold, but because it hurts but because there can be a lt of swelling.  

Some urologists even offer incentives during the March Madness time and offer things like coupons for free pizza delivery, sports magazines and "survival kits."

Dr. Richard Chopp (which of course shortens to the most awesome name for a urologists that performs vacestomies in the world - Dr. Dick Chopp!) at the Urology Team in Austin, TX gives his patients a t-shirt that says, "I Got Chopped at the Urology Team"  (I wonder how many actually wear that out of the house.)

 

Mistakes women make trying to look attractive.

Hey girls... Not every "beauty trick" is attractive.  And when you read these one thing will ring out in your head... Or at least did in mine - I wonder if you will feel the same.  I will reveal my answer at the end of this post - I'm interested to see if you feel the same

1.  The Trout Pout
Or the "Fish Face"  Yes... you know it.  I'm not sure why girls do this but they suck in their cheese and purse their lips.  Or even just get their lips surgically puffed up.  Yes, I guess that bigger lips are sexier because men have some kind of oral fixation - but no one thinks that big puffy lips that look like you got attacked by bees is attractive.  Leave the collagen at the doctors office - if you want your lips to look bigger, put on some shiny gloss.  And lets be honest, the picture at the left looks like the girl had an implant of the other lips on her face.  And while a guy might think it's kind of cool to have a set of vag lips on your face, it's not all that attractive in the real world. 

2. Little Baby Voice
Baby Voices are good for one thing... Babies.  I think they only people it's really sexy for are those wierd ass people who have the fetish to dress up like adult babies - I think I saw a CSI on it once (and once it's on CSI you know it's not all that of a downlow fetish - and that shit is scary - do we really have a lot of grown women out there sexually arroused by acting like babies - ugh!).  So if you are one of those people, knock yourself out, but for the rest of us - leave your baby voice for when you are around babies (and even then they say the baby voice isn't good for kids - it teaches them improper English and voice annunciation).  Besides, you never want to talk to a guy in baby voice and insuate that he's your father - that's just giving him a little too much control. 

3.  Hair Extension
Call me crazy (yeah, go ahead, i know you want to!)... but most of the guys I know prefer their women natural... And that means all natural.  No extra hair pasted on to your head.  No guy wants to be running his fingers through your hair and get stuck on some kind of weave or pull out a big ol chunk of fake hair.  I can just see him pulling out a section of hair and panicing and trying to put it back on while you are completely unaware watching a movie.  Yeah, he's not going to like that.  And you don't want to give him any excuse to run - and men make up any excuse - the point is to not give him any.

4. Spray Tans
If you look like an orange and smell like a tropical fruit from all the products it's not a good thing.  And this one is not just for the girls out there - some men are addicted to the spray tan (and it's not just the spray tan, some go for the old school tanning bed which is even worse because some day they are going to have the skin cancer to remind them of their "glory days")  Excessive tanning is not good for anyone.  It's not attractive, not does it show anything but you have a little too much time on your hands.  If you really feel the need to have a little color in your skin - go for a little bronzer girls.  It's safer and can be washed off!  And FYI, the picture to the right is a POSITIVE before and after from a tanning website.  Personally I think she looks a lot better before - granted I'm a white girl that could probably double as a ghost - but I like my paleness. 

5.  Chronic Dieting
Staying healthy is good (I probably should think about it more often - I tend to take the idea that I will start excercising and watching my diet better always - next week... But next week never comes - interesting how it works like that...)  But those girls who are ALWAYS dieting, you know the type, they can ever cheat because it would do horrible things to their body are such buzz kills.  You jsut want to shove chocolate cake down their throat and then tie them to something so they can't go and obsessively work out afterwards.  Granted, maybe that's a little psychotic... but I don't like people like that - and neither do them.  men are carefree and even if they are extremely healthy cheat all the time!  And that's cheating ontheir diet, not one you!

6. Acting Dumb
If someone can tell me why smart girls act dumb just to get men's attention I probably would give you... well maybe a penny (I'm a little strapped for cash right now...)  But I just don't get it - Guys make like the dumb act for awhile - A dumb girl is fun to play with - she doesn't talk back nor does she have any opinion on what to do so you can really just boss her around.  But for the long term, a dumb girl is really just boring.  And how does a smart girl act that way for long?  Do you really just hide it? 

8. Chicken Cutlets
And not the kind you eat.... For those of you who don't know - Chicken Cutlets is the slang term for a bra insert that literally looks like a little chicken cutlet.  A woman puts it in her bra to increase her cup size - up to a full cup increase.  These are all about false advertising of course.  And what's even worse isthat when wearing these and hooking up you obviously have to be very proactive.  You can't just go to town and go hog wild (second animal refernce), instead the girl must take a break and remove said cutlets from her bra and hope in the throws of pasion the guy doesn't notice a whole cup size mssiing from each bra.  If not removed, you definately risk the danger of  your secret being discovered and that's just ugly. 

9. Sharpie Brows
Yup, over plucking.  I would say 9 in 10 guys don't even know that girls even pluck their eye brows and would only notice if a girl had a really nasty unibrow.  And while eyebrows are barely noticed, they are also highly noticed if they have gone bad.  You know - the unibrow (totally ok to pluck, wax, etc), or the very harsh drawn on brow which looks really stupid.  So again, like I've said before - go natural. 

10.  Press on Nails
For those of us who grew up in the 80's we lived in the era of Lee Press on Nails and those were awesome - when we were TEENAGERS.  But remember girls, we are all over 30 now and have to accept that we are grownups (I know - it sucks). And Press-on Nails aren't attractive.  Not only do they look so fake, but they also are very dangerous - they come unstuck in some of the strangest places (his back during sex, during cooking, etc).  Besides, these days, natural short nails are actually pretty darn attractive. 

Dating based on color... skin color.

I was a little shocked today when I came across an article about a new book by J.C. Davies called,  I've Got the Fever: What's Race Gotta Do With It?  about how to date men of different races.  I gotta say, she's one ballsy woman.  And it might even be worth reading - just to see what she says!  Do the stereotypes run true?

Her book has five sections, each section dedicated to a different culture: latino, black, asian, indian and jewish.  And apparently she answers all the burning questions that no one wants to ask but everyone wants to know:

Do Asian men like their women submissive? The author of the article gives us some tidbits from the book, and says that Ms. Davies tells us that the book empowers women to chose a man (based on his ethnicity of course!) based on how he fits into our wants and needs.  She shares that "Latino men are macho and possessive, Asians are rubbish between the sheets (note to self!!!) and black men don't like talking about Al Sharpton) 

I gotta tell you this book is a little out there - but what book or philosophy isn't based on huge assumptions? 



Are Jewish men really cheap?

Are all Indian men well versed in the Kama Sutra?

Do Latin lovers live up to their reputation?

Do Black men actually have big, er, uh, equipment?

Looking for a nerd? Top 10 Cities to find one..

I'm always here to help everyone find love.  Everyone!  And everyone includes nerds...

So for all my nerds out there (and I classify as one myself!) here are the Top 10 Cities to find a nerd.

1. Sunnyvale, CA — In the hub of the intellectually stimulating Silicon Valley, Sunnyvale is home to some of the brainiest companies, including Yahoo!, Palm, Inc., and several aerospace/defense companies. Sunnyvale is one of the few U.S. cities to have a single unified Department of Public Safety (where all personnel are trained as firefighters, police officers and EMTs), so they can respond to any of these types of emergencies from a single department. Now that’s smart!

2. Cambridge, MA — Cambridge is home to two highly esteemed and prominent schools, Harvard University and the Massachusetts Institute of Technology (M.I.T.). The city is also noted in history as the birthplace of the U.S. Army by the scholarly George Washington.

3. Somerville, MA — Cambridge’s nerdy neighbor, Somerville, is home to the private research university, Tufts. As one of the most densely populated municipalities near Boston, there are many clever minds to be found within a compact area.

4. Berkeley, CA — This San Francisco treat is the site of the University of California at Berkeley, the oldest institute of higher learning within the revered University of California systems. The state-of-the-art Lawrence Berkeley National Laboratory also calls this city home.



5. Santa Clara, CA — Resting in the center of Silicon Valley, Santa Clara hosts the headquarters for Intel, Sun Microsystems and many other high-tech companies. It’s also the home of Santa Clara University (the oldest institution of higher learning in the state of California) and Mission College.

6. Ann Arbor, MI — In Ann Arbor, the University of Michigan employs about 30,000 people — which equals roughly 26% of the city’s population. The city’s economy mostly depends on developments in high technology, as many companies are drawn to the area due to the educated alumnae that have matriculated there.



7. Boulder, CO — Not only serving as the home base for the University of Colorado, Boulder is also a burgeoning hub for high-technology, electronics and aerospace companies. Five of every six adults in the Boulder area (82.5%) have attended college.

8. Columbia, MD — The nearby National Security Agency and Fort Meade Army base account for more than 8,000 highly educated jobs that can be found in Columbia. On another nerdy note, the city takes its street names from famous works of art and literature. In 2010, Columbia was ranked #2 on Money Magazine’s list of the top 100 “Best Places to Live” in the United States.



9. Fairfax, VA — In May of 2008, Forbes commended Fairfax for its strong public school system, high median salary, and financially fit employers in the city, which include SunTrust and Federal Technology Services.



10. Rockville, MD — Situated at the core of the Interstate 270 Technology Corridor, Rockville is home to numerous software and biotechnology companies as well as several federal government institutions. Its per-capita venture capital investment is the highest of any town outside of California.

Things never to say to a girl with big Boobs

So.... we all know I have big boobs.  It's just a fact of life.  And while I'm not exactly a skinny girl these days, even when I was at my lightest in high school I was still blessed in the chest area.  Playing soccer in high school and college I had to often double up my sports bras - and that was even with the best most supportive sports bras around.

When I heard the words, "Miracle Bra" or "Wonder Bra" or "Water Bra" or even "Padded" I shudder.  I don't need a whole lot of push ups - adding extra padding is just bad.  Boys (and even girls) are constantly commenting on the "girls."  And I gotta tell you - it's not all good! 

So when I found this article on theasylum.com I had to share it for all my big boobed sisters out there! 

10 Things NEVER to say to a girl with big boobs! 

10. "I'm usually not that into giant boobs."
Personally I can't say that I've ever had a man say this to me.  When they see me they know what they are getting into.  But no man should ever say this to me - it's like saying they aren't attracted to girls like me, but they'll make an acception. 

9. "How big are they?"
If I had a nickel for every time a person (yes - men AND women) asked me this I'd probably be a millionaire.  I'd like to tell them an A cup and see if they believe me - it's OBVIOUS they aren't. 

8. "I'm sorry, I can't help staring at them."
How about you just don't?  My eyes are about a foot and a half north of them...

7. "I'm actually more of a leg man." Well, I have a set of them too - maybe you should stop staring at my boobs and look at them!
6. "Do you have back pain?" Why does everyone ask that?  Is it really any of their business?  And the answer - FYI, is yes.  If you had two large melons just hanging off the front of you basically being supported with two straps on your shoulders - it does hurt.
5. "I bet your mama gave those to you." Yes, my mom wrapped them up in a nice box and gave them to me when I was 13 years old.  I would have much rather had a phone in my room.  And for those of you interested... I'm a DD, and my mom is barely an A... so No, she definately did not "give" these suckers to me.

4. "Are they real?" If you can't tell the difference between fake and real tits -- then you have a real problem.  If they bounce and exactly round they are real - and real is better.
3. "Can I motorboat them?" No.  The answer is always no. 
2. "You should work at Hooters."  Orange looks particularily bad with my skin tone.  It just washes me out.  So I'll have to pass.
1. "Nice tits." Duh. I know.

Help? My puppy's surgery

Most of you know I have dogs, and I'm very involved in their lives. It's not very often I ask for help - but today I am. Sheba, my failed foster turned amazing puppy has been diagosed with a possible cancerous mammary tumor. She has surgery scheduled at the end of this month and it will cost an unexpected $1,000.

I have a large number of readers of this blog from all over the world - and I do this for fun and for free. But if you could just help (even a $1.00) it would be amazing. Both Sheba and I would apperciate it greatly.

-L