Craig's List Ad of the Day

It's that mid afternoon slump at work and I'm falling asleep. I've tried walking around the office, going to the bathroom, idle chit-chat with the coworkers (which I really hate). Now it's time for the big guns - Craig's List! CL is always good for entertainment and it never fails to wake me up because I always find a post that I just cannot believe I'm reading. And Craig, you did not fail me today.

It’s tough to date when you’re married - 68

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Date: 2010-07-01, 12:19PM EDT
Hi there.
Just so you know, I am very real, and yes, I have all the male body parts you desire.

I’m a MWM who is looking for a MWF (or DWF) for a semi-long-term relationship. I am NOT looking to break up anyone’s marriage. Mine’s not ideal, but I’m not ready to throw in the towel yet, and I am looking to fill a void. I’m not interested in a one-time thing.

What you get: An attractive, sane, sincere, creative, fit, well-educated, literate male with a full life. I’ve got a lot of sexual energy that goes unfulfilled...just looking for the right woman to unleash it on.

I am also a highly respectable parent, professional, and good citizen--the man no one would ever expect to live a double life.
What I seek: A MWW (or DWW) who is attractive, sane, sincere, creative, well-educated, literate and smart. Someone who knows what she wants out of an affair and has done it successfully before (I have). A woman who can appreciate that I will be taking risks to meet you and that I will only do that when I feel comfortable that you are as you describe yourself. A woman who understands that this is a relationship based on passion, respect, and discretion — I’m going to need all three of these.

What the “we” will entail: One or two emails a day, physical contact a few times a month, an emotional and physical connection. I want to lust after your mind and your body.

Let’s get this started: Please tell me about yourself. The more you tell me, I guarantee the more likely it will be that I respond back.
Information I’d like to see in your first email:
* You must be married (or divorced), kids are a plus
* You must be between 38 and 55
* If you don’t include a photo then please describe your body type
* Describe your sexual interests. Do NOT send me a picture of your “body” thank you.
* Give me an idea what your time and distance constraints are
* Any other information you would like to include!

Be forewarned that I am not looking for a "Casual Encounter."

Did you know it's tough to date when you are married?  I just want to say a big, NO SHIT!?!?!  Did you know it's tough to date when you are single! 

I cannot believe, for one, that this guy has the balls to be looking for someone to date when he is in a relationship.  But not only is he looking for someone to date, he's being extremely picky about it too!  Notice the list of "musts" he includes at the end of his posting. His "ideal" woman must be married (of course, what fun would it be if you BOTH weren't cheating!), between 38 and 55, have a photo, but not a nude one, your time and distance constraints and your sexual interests.  Note, that the only details we get about him is that he's sane (debatable after seeing this post), attractive (by whose account?), sincere (but not trustworthy, as evidenced by his ability to successfully manage his marriage and at least one additional relationship), creative (I'll give him this one - this is a pretty creative post), fit (says who?), well-educated (humm?), literate (Congrats?  You can write, I assume you can read) male with a full life (well, of course - you are married!  And you want to add more women in your life, I actually think you might have a little too much time on your hands!). 

But note also, that he points out at the very last sentence he does not want to have a casual encounter!  So no one time fuck and run for this gentleman.  He wants to wine and dine his mistresses, but don't think you'll ever get anywhere, because as he said his marriage may be crap - but he won't leave it.

Umm really?  Do guys think they can get away with this crap?  And the scarier thing is that I think some of them do!

Wait. I forgot to mention. This guy - he's 68. SIXTY-EIGHT years old. That's nearly 70. Men at 70, especially married men at 70 should not be thinking about "having a lot of sexual energy to unleash on a woman" as he so eloquently puts it. Yes, viagra is a great invention for men, but not so they can go out and whore around - yuck!